Connecting Faith with the Realities of Lust and Pornography

You shall not commit adultery - Exodus 20:14

You have heard that it was said, "Do not commit adultery." But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart -Matthew 5:27–29

There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. -Romans 8:1–2 NIV

Hi Everybody

This week's topic in our Sunday series on the 10 Commandments was lust. Lust (sexual desire minus honoring the humanity in a person) has been a problem since the beginning of time. People, being naturally innovative, creative and fallen beings, quickly created pornography to feed our lust. Historically, however, one had to work, or at least use some effort to access pornography. Through the internet we now all have instant access. What historically was a problem for a few has exploded into a problem for many. And while grace tells us that there is no condemnation for followers of Jesus who struggle with pornography, viewing pornography is not life giving and honoring -- it is not the way of Jesus.

The reality is that whenever and in whatever ways we continually walk down a path other than the path of Jesus, we will turn further inward on ourselves -- into self condemnation and accusation -- and move further and further from the life giving connection to Jesus himself. Jesus continually woos us to himself. Yet when we walk down another path, we can get stuck, we get trapped, we get lost. This is true of the path of lust and pornography. In order to turn off that path which gives no life and back onto the path of life, we need to grab hold of the reality that there is no condemnation from God, but rather an invitation from him to move into a better way -- and then take action to do so. In any area of our life (including lust and pornography) that moves away from the life of Jesus, we need to draw near to him (spend time resting in his presence), to invite others into our struggle (for support and accountability) and to take advantage of any tools, resources or methods that might be available to assist us.

Jesus said, "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." (John 10:10) He does not intend for you to be stuck -- he wants more for you (peace, joy and hope to name a few). I promised that I would provide you with some resources to help if you are struggling with issues of pornography. If you are, I pray for courage for you to invite others into your struggle (that you share with others at Creekside) and to take advantage of the resources that are available.

Covenant Eyes software that tracks all online activity and emails a log to accountability partners each week. Use promo code YouthMinistry for a free 30 day trial.
This video on YouTube talks more about Covenant Eyes, as well.
Porn Again Christian is a free, downloadable ebook written by Pastor Mark Driscoll that deals with the struggle of pornography in a man's life.
When A Man's Eye Wanders. It's a little dated, but the material is still good.
XXXChurch.com is a ministry that helps men and women overcome their struggle with lust and pornography. They have many good resources, events, tools, podcasts, and more.

Peace, hope and love

Are You A Murderer?

You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, "Do not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment." But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell. Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift. -Matthew 5:21–24

I was listening to a radio talk show a couple of years ago and the topic was morality and the 10 Commandments. The basic point of the show was that if people actually obeyed The 10 Commandments, our society would be a far better place. At one point, a caller brought up Jesus' words about murder from the Sermon on the Mount (as were his words about adultery which follow). The host emphatically made the point that Jesus was obviously using hyperbole and could not really mean that God would hold people who had inappropriate anger accountable in the same way as he did murderers. Such a view was ridiculous and extreme, he said, because it raised matters of thought, heart and feeling to the same level of actions. "Actions," he said, "we can control, thoughts and feelings we cannot." "God cannot hold us accountable for our thoughts and feelings, that would not be fair," he concluded.

His conclusion made me sad, because it demonstrated a fundamental lack of understanding of the beauty and the fullness of the good news of Jesus. The radio guy was right, actions we can control (or try to). If we are only accountable for our actions, we are in control of our own salvation and our own goodness. If, on the other hand we responsible to God for all of our errant thoughts, feelings and desires in the same way as if they were played out in reality, then all we can do is throw up our hands and say "I can't do that." And Jesus says, "exactly." "Welcome." "Come to me, all you who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest." "Come to me with your actions and your thoughts, your deeds and your desires, and I will change transform them all." I have the power to do it, you do not." I am convinced that it is only when we come to the point of actually surrendering all of ourselves to God that we can truly be free to actually live in the life that we were meant to live and free to help create a better world in which to live it.

Author Esther Elizabeth writes, "When we let go of hatred, prejudices, arrogance and entitlement from the heart, our actions change. We love, forgive and hope from the heart, and from there our world changes. So I offer this prayer for us: 'Holy One, we give you permission to carve away all that is not pure in our hearts. We invite you to create space in our crowded hearts for you to dwell. Create in us a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within us. We ask you to align our priorities with yours, and awaken our hearts from their sleep.'"

That is my prayer as well.

Honor Your Father And Your Mother

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and mother"-which is the first commandment with a promise- "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth." -Ephesians 6:1-3

If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters-yes, even his own life- he cannot be my disciple. -Luke 14:26

[Jesus] replied to him, "Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?" Pointing to his disciples, he said, "Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother." -Matthew 12:48-50

Hi Everybody

As Creekside we are in a series called A Rule For Life, where we are looking at the 10 Commandments. It is my belief that these 10 "rules," rather than a burden or an unachievable standard, are actually life-giving gifts that show God's heartbeat and love for us. Like all of God's word -- Old and New Testament -- they must be seen through the lens of Jesus (of whom all the Scriptures speak), the New Testament (the people of God reconstituted through Jesus' birth, life, death and resurrection), culture (which is where we live) and time (the thousands of years of fleshing out of God's redemptive plan for all things).

This week we talked about the Fifth Commandment, "honor your father and mother."

One of the ways that we reflect the image of God in which we are made, is by living in community. Family is the first community that any of us are a part of. Real community is good. Real community is hard. Real community is learned -- from the day we are born into the community of family. And so God says "honor your father and your mother." In doing so, we learn about living in authority, about the image of God in people, about fallibility and love mixed together, in community.

At the same time that the Bible tells us to honor our parents (and as parents to not exasperate our children), Jesus says a remarkable thing in the verse above from the book of Luke. He says if we really want to be His disciple, we must hate our parents and that they must hate us. What's up with that? He says in Matthew, that His real mom and family are those who do the will of God. Are either of those "honoring your mother and father?" The short answer, yes. Here's why.

Any relationship that we have and all that we do needs to flow from our relationship with God. They must flow from our relationship with God or they simply won't work right. If they do not flow from God they will tend to become about us, and will very likely move towards dysfunction and brokenness -- at least on some level. When, in contrast, we follow Jesus first, rest in the belovedness and acceptance that He holds us in and then move into our relationships with that foundation, we can really love people -- including our parents and our kids, we can honor the first and not exasperate the second, we can live into this Rule for Life without it being simply a rule. When we love God, before loving people, we fueled by the first and able to to the second.

What are you doing these days to Love God and Love people (in that order)?

Peace, hope and love

The Rhythm of Sabbath

Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy.
- Exodus 20:8

The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath.
- Mark 2:27





I started my sermon this past Sunday with a question: Are you busy? The chuckles that I heard told me what I expected, "do you even have to ask?"

All of us are busy. I think we look at the stage of life that we find ourselves in and say "as soon as I get through __________ I will be less busy." Guess what? It does not happen. We are all busy, and will continue to be. That is why it is so important to be intentional about resting, even in the busyness. That is why it is so important to practice the rhythm of sabbath.

The practice or rhythm of Sabbath is a commandment, but it is also an invitation. It is a way to connect into the rhythm of life that God intended us to live in -- for the health of our body, mind and soul. I am convinced that it is God's plan and prescription that each of us live into and observe the Sabbath. I also think that as we do so, the qualities of biblical Sabbath (STOP, REST, DELIGHT, CONTEMPLATE) infuse our other six days. When we stop, we embrace our limits. God is God. He is creator, I am his creature. The world will continue fine when I stop. We rest by filling the day with things other than work, with things that bring joy and refreshment. We delight in the things that God has given us, in the little and the big. Rather than simply taking things away, think about things you can add (e.g. special desserts, a movie, a creative family activity). Finally we contemplate; we spend time connecting with God in ways that are meaningful to us, we realize the good gifts that he has given us. STOP, REST, DELIGHT, CONTEMPLATE.

Sabbath. What refreshes you? What would it look like for you to enter into this rhythm? What is stopping you from trying?

John Freeman wrote an interesting book entitled, The Tyranny of E-Mail: The Four-Thousand-Year Journey to Your Inbox. While not a book on Sabbath, he offers several creative ways to try to eliminate some of the busyness in our daily routine. Give them a try if you find them helpful.

1. Don’t Send. E-mail only creates more e-mail.
2. Don’t Check it First Thing in the Morning or Late at Night.
3. Check it only Twice a Day. This allows you to set the agenda for your day.
4. Keep a Written To-Do List and Incorporate E-mail into It.
5. Whenever Possible, Call or Talk in Person.

Try it out. Share what you experience when you experiment with entering into the practice and the rhythm of sabbath -- and have fun.